Keep Your Cool During Back to School
No one wants summer to end. However, the reality of “back to school” preparation is upon us. No matter how old your student may be, it’s important to make sure that everyone is set up for success. (And, for the record, that includes you too, mom!)
Some of the back to school planning is fun and exciting, and it can be easy to get buy-in from kids. However, some of the more important prep factors are not quite as popular.
It’s August, and school may be starting as early as this month. It’s a good time to make sure that summer work packets and assignments are complete! (If it’s possible to get a jump-start on parent paperwork, this could be a great time to fill out the emergency care cards!)
A few weeks before school starts, it can be helpful to implement some routine around bedtime and wake up time. (Yes, it’s hard to get kids to sleep when it is still light out.) However, having them read in bed can be a step toward getting on track.
Whether buying lunch or bringing it from home, work with kids to establish preferred lunch and snack options. Consider creating a “snack station,” where kids can select items to put in their lunchboxes. Even elementary school aged kids can pre-pack a few days worth of snacks into baggies or containers.
As new school supplies are purchased, make sure that things are labeled, and be sure that everyone understands where things are to be kept. Keeping bags in one central location can help minimize morning chaos related to “lost” items.
Discuss academic and behavioral expectations in a positive way. Most kids want to do well in the school setting. Reinforce their strengths as part of the conversation. Reassure your kids that you are there to support them, through their “wins” and “losses.”
School safety is at the forefront of concerns for most parents (and for many students). Reassure children that the rules and protocols at school are designed so that the adults can keep them safe. Familiarize yourself with the terminology utilized.
If your student is going to a new school, there can be even more anxiety. Whether this is related to a move, or simply a transition to the next “level,” if there is a back to school night offered, try to attend. Even going to visit the school grounds can help ease nerves. Walking around the school yard, you can reflect on the experiences other students have had in the past, and reinforce that your student will have their own positive journey.
There are also key things that parents can do to help ease the transition for themselves. First, prepare for the unexpected! Buses are undoubtedly going to be late. Schedules may get confused. Have back-up plans for transportation and pick-up.
Make sure to maximize communication. Schools and districts typically send out multiple emails, so double-check that they have the best address on file for you. Your in-box will be flooded at times. It may potentially be easier to use a separate email address specific to school-related communication. (Yes- it will be one extra thing to check!)
It’s important to remember that our kids will follow our lead, so it is important that we maintain a positive attitude about the back to school transition. Adjust your expectations for yourself and for your kids. They will undoubtedly be tired and cranky, and you may be too! (This is the perfect time to have easy dinners scheduled.)
Finding common connections for the transition can be reassuring for kids and parents alike. For little ones, reading books about the first day of school can help normalize fears. Here are some recommendations from a children’s librarian.
Sometimes a shared piece of “jewelry” can be a visual reminder of the connection between parents and kids. For younger kiddos, making matching bracelets can be a fun bonding project, and can provide a transitional object. For older kids, buying jewelry or a key chain may be easier. (I have matching mantra bands with each of my girls, purchased when they started high school.)
A shared mantra can offer a source of connection as well. A simple phrase about pride, bravery, or kindness can be meaningful during times of stress.
Remember, the transition back to school can be a time of mixed feelings for kids and parents. Finding ways to prepare for it, while still soaking up the last days of summer, allows for us to enjoy the best of both worlds. (At least until someone forgets their lunch on the kitchen table!)